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THE INANE RAMBLINGS FROM UP NORFF #59

THE INANE RAMBLINGS FROM UP NORFF #59

Rob Cairney30 Mar 2022 - 08:04
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‘NOWT SO QUEER AS YORKSHIRE FOLK’

THE INANE RAMBLINGS FROM UP NORFF
‘NOWT SO QUEER AS YORKSHIRE FOLK’
BY KAREN BROWNE

The Views Expressed Are Solely My Own, Are Written Tongue In Cheek
And Should Be Taken With A Pinch Of Salt

SATURDAY HEADLINES
Non-League Day saw many clubs trying new ideas to attract those fans of the big boys of football with free admission, clothing donations and fancy dress amongst the many ideas. The day also brought about the first of the Promotion/Relegation issues being announced as the final whistles blew. Stotfold’s win ensured the club were guaranteed at least a play-off spot while for new boys Irchester United that late equalizer condemned the club to a bottom three place and relegation.

Saturday brought about 95 goals from the 24 games (an average of 3.96 per game). Jake Anthony (Harpenden Town) led the way with four goals while Richard Pacquette (Harefield United), Godlove Oppong (Tring Athletic), Redha Zekri (Letchworth Garden City Eagles), Conor Clarke (Stotfold), Josh Douglas Smith (Old Bradwell United) all netted hat tricks.

Saturday’s Stats: 24 games played of which 14 were home wins, 8 away wins and 2 draws.

(Most League Wins – all Divisions):
26 New Salamis
25 Stotfold
24 Risborough Rangers

(Most League Draws – all Divisions):
9 Harefield United, Leighton Town
8 Ardley United, Ampthill Town, Penn & Tylers Green
7 Arlesey Town, Dunstable Town, Harpenden Town, Milton Keynes Irish, Bedford

(Most League Defeats – all Divisions):
26 Irchester United
23 Burton Park Wanderers
23 Crawley Green, London Colney.

Without a Draw:
(Division Two League):
Aston Clinton and Codicote

Most Goals Scored:
(Premier Division League):
102 New Salamis.
(Division One League):
104 Stotfold.
(Division Two League):
85 Old Bradwell United.

Most Goals Conceded:
(Premier Division League):
101 Holmer Green.
(Division One League):
103 Burton Park Wanderers.
(Division Two League):
79 Buckingham United

Fewest Goals Scored:
(Premier Division League):
32 London Colney.
(Division One League):
33 Irchester United.
(Division Two League):
23 The 61FC (Luton)

Fewest Goals Conceded:
(Premier Division League):
17 Risborough Rangers
(Division One League):
24 Stotfold
(Division Two League):
16 Old Bradwell United

Saturday’s Highest Attendances: 524 Leighton Town v Oxhey Jets, 220 Aylesbury Vale Dynamos v Risborough Rangers, Dunstable Town v Leverstock Green and 209 Stotfold v Kidlington Reserves.

Season’s Highest Attendances to date (Premier Division Clubs): 868 Leighton Town v Luton Town (Beds Senior Cup), 524 Leighton Town v Oxhey Jets and 491 Leighton Town v Tring Athletic.

Season’s Highest Attendances to date (Division One Clubs): 1904 Long Crendon v Wycombe Wanderers (Berks & Bucks Senior Cup), 533 Stotfold v Winslow United and 404 Stotfold v Ampthill Town.

Season’s Highest Attendances to date (Division Two Clubs): 212 Bovingdon v Totternhoe, 175 Bovingdon v Berkhamsted Raiders and 155 Bovingdon v Sarratt (Division Two Cup).

Saturday 26th March

PREMIER DIVISION
Non-League Day brought about no change at both ends of the Premier Division standings, at the top there were routine wins for the leading six clubs, leaders New Salamis remain after winning 4-0 at Milton Keynes Irish and more on this one later in the ramblings. Second placed Risborough Rangers were also on the road, their trip to Aylesbury Vale Dynamos bringing about a 5-0 win while third placed Hadley saw off visiting Broadfields United 3-0. Behind the top three Leighton Town defeated a battling ten man Oxhey Jets in front of the SSML’s second highest League attendance of the season (524) thanks to two second half strikes following a red card for the visitors, Flackwell Heath won by a solitary goal at their neighbours Holmer Green, the hosts remain second from bottom while Harpenden Town thumped Baldock Town 6-1 thanks to a four goal haul from hosts striker Jake Anthony. At the bottom the current wooden spoonists Crawley Green were beaten by the odd goal in three at home by Ardley United while the free falling London Colney suffered their 12th successive league defeat when losing 0-6 at home against Tring Athletic. Elsewhere Dunstable Town squeezed past visiting Leverstock Green by the odd goal in three while Harefield United thumped Arlesey Town 5-0, having lead by a solitary goal at the break the hosts were in rampant form in the second half to bag the three points on offer. Full results and goalscorers are listed below.

0-5 Aylesbury Vale Dynamos v Risborough Rangers (Coles [2], Schmidt, James, Kedzierski) Attendance: 220
1-2 Crawley Green v Ardley United (Hankins) / (Odhiambo, Courtney) Attendance: 41
2-1 Dunstable Town v Leverstock Green (Stirling, Baker) / (Mooney [pen]) Attendance: 220
3-0 Hadley v Broadfields United (Uribarri, Ofori, J Edwards) Attendance: 123
5-0 Harefield United v Arlesey Town (Pacquette [3] [1 pen], Clifton, Bircham) Attendance: 85
6-1 Harpenden Town v Baldock Town (Anthony [4], Plowright, McGreevy) / (Hay) Attendance: 161
0-1 Holmer Green v Flackwell Heath (Driffill) Attendance: 145
2-0 Leighton Town v Oxhey Jets (Fitzgerald, Campbell) Attendance: 524
0-6 London Colney v Tring Athletic (Oppong [3], Stevens [2], Farruch) Attendance: 35
0-4 Milton Keynes Irish v New Salamis (Asamoah [2], Ogunseye, Michael) Attendance: 64

DIVISION ONE
Title chasing Stotfold ensured themselves a play-off spot at the very least on Saturday with a thoroughly dominate 7-0 home win over relegation threatened Kidlington Reserves in front of yet another large crowd at the JSJ Stadium. Third placed Ampthill Town were thankful to a stunning late equalizer at bottom club Irchester United, the goal not only denied the hosts a rare win but also condemned them to a guaranteed bottom three finish in their debut SSML campaign and relegation. Elsewhere at the lower end of the standings London Tigers boosted their hopes of avoiding the drop with a 3-0 home success against fellow strugglers Raunds Town while Langford and Amersham Town both suffered away defeats, the former losing by a solitary goal at neighbours Bedford while latter were beaten 1-5 at Rushden & Higham United. Elsewhere Shefford Town & Campton continue to push hard for the play-offs with a 3-2 home win against Long Crendon, a result that all but rules their visitors out of contention. Northampton Sileby Rangers kept their play-offs hopes alive with a 2-1 win against visiting Thame United Reserves while in the day’s other Division One fixture Letchworth Garden City Eagles edged out visiting Buckingham Athletic by the odd goal in five. Full results and goalscorers (where known) are listed below.

1-0 Bedford v Langford (Joseph) Attendance: 27
2-2 Irchester United v Ampthill Town (Busby [2]) / (Butler, Burke) Attendance: 38
3-2 Letchworth Garden City Eagles v Buckingham Athletic (Zekri [3]) / (Brazier, Ikuyinminu) Attendance: 23
3-0 London Tigers v Raunds Town (Morris, Miezou, Hadi) Attendance: Unknown
2-1 Northampton Sileby Rangers v Thame United Reserves (Cirelli, Burrows) / (Unknown) Attendance: 65
5-1 Rushden & Higham United v Amersham Town (McMahon, Matiyenga, Reynolds, Morgan, Aidulis) / (Bennett) Attendance: 41
3-2 Shefford Town & Campton v Long Crendon (Metcalfe, Ingham, Day) / (Simpson, Reilly) Attendance: 49
7-0 Stotfold v Kidlington Reserves (Clarke [3], Sutton, Stevenson, Younger, Kersey) Attendance: 209

DIVISION TWO
Division Two leaders Old Bradwell United were ruthless yesterday as they moved three points clear at the top with an emphatic 6-0 success at struggling The 61FC (Luton), the visitors have now gone eleven league games without defeat while the hosts are winless in the league since mid-January. The big game at the top between third placed Pitstone & Ivinghoe and visiting fourth placed Milton Keynes College Football Academy was a tight affair and it was no surprise the clubs shared the spoils with a 1-1 draw with the hosts levelling in the dying minutes. At the foot of the table Tring Corinthians AFC’s hopes of avoiding the wooden spoon remain after a solitary goal defeat at Risborough Rangers Development while Sarratt won the big relegation six-pointer by the odd goal in nine against visiting Buckingham United after trailing at the break and more on this can be found later in these ramblings. Aston Clinton continued their fine form of late with a 3-0 success at Berkhamsted Raiders, the visitors have several games in hand on those above them. It was a late first half penalty that settled the points in the day’s other game between Codicote and New Bradwell St Peter, the Milton Keynes based visitors taking full advantage although looking at the excellent coverage from ‘The Cold End’ the ‘Cod’ should have had a spot kick themselves in the second period. Full results and goalscorers (where known) are listed below.

0-3 Berkhamsted Raiders v Aston Clinton (MacDonald [2] [1 pen], Banert) Attendance: 30
0-1 Codicote v New Bradwell St Peter (Unknown [pen]) Attendance: 55
1-1 Pitstone & Ivinghoe v Milton Keynes College Football Academy (Batten) / (Boyce) Attendance: 77
1-0 Risborough Rangers Development v Tring Corinthians AFC (Clarke) Attendance: 48
5-4 Sarratt v Buckingham United (Thomas [2], Loakes, Woollard, Ormsby) / (Field [2], Opponent Own Goal, Hind) Attendance: 40
0-6 The 61FC (Luton) v Old Bradwell United (Douglas-Smith [3], Valentine, Cooke, Bird) Attendance: 15

AND FINALLY

COMMITTEE AWAYDAYS

Bob Flight was at Milton Keynes Irish and sends the following report:-
League leaders New Salamis travelled to MK Irish, who have a long list of injured or unavailable players, and secured the three points with an emphatic 4-0 victory. The game was only five minutes old before Salamis scored when a shot hit the Irish post but bounced out straight to Elijah Ogunseye who lashed it back into the home net. Nothing was seen of the home attack as they failed to muster a single shot on the visitor’s goal. Right on half time, Salamis scored again direct from a free kick as Derek Asamoah shot the ball into the Irish goal in off the far post. MK Irish improved in the second half and despite a couple of shots that went wide, failed to trouble the Salamis goal and only a super save by home keeper Jack Taylor kept Salamis from scoring again. The game then drifted into a stalemate with Salamis content to sit on their lead and MK Irish unable to pressure their opponents. However, the final minutes of the game exploded into life as Salamis scored two goals in quick succession. Firstly Asamoah benefited from a defensive mistake to score his second and Salamis third goal right on full time and secondly substitute Antonio Michael manged to find the net with a back heel effort in the first minute of added time. Thus Salamis completed a comfortable, if not an inspiring, win to maintain their promotion hopes.

According to the watching mad Scot Bill Hamilton, It would be hard to find a better advertisement for Non-League Day than the fayre provided for the residents of the idyllic Hertfordshire village of Sarratt. Their optimistic resolve to see their local team take on fellow Division Two strugglers Buckingham United was rewarded with a nine-goal thriller, Sarratt turning almost certain defeat into an incredible win with two goals deep into added time. What this game proved is that excitement can be generated not only by watching the most talented and skilful players in action but also by those whose sheer determination, commitment and obvious enjoyment of the game can provide a very watchable contest. Football’s beauty derives from its unpredictability. We had everything on view here …. fast, mazy runs, unbelievable misses, one of the craziest own goals you could possibly imagine, an outstanding strike from Buckingham’s Patrick Field which gave his side an interval lead and one which he extended early in the second half. 4-2 down with just minutes to play, it looked all over for Sarratt until Reon Thomas slotted in and with referee Andrew McCree glancing at his watch as the last minute of injury time approached, Craig Woollard levelled things up. The villagers who had made that special effort to support non-League day were more than satisfied … but wait, surely not, one more attack and a bullet header from Dan Ormsby completed the most incredible of turnarounds. It couldn’t be, could it – oh yes, Sarratt 5 Buckingham United 4. I have a feeling some of these newfound fans may be back again soon!

Sarratt fans celebrate last gasp winner in nine goal thriller

The Twittersphere produced another couple of interesting tweets – firstly this one from Arlesey Town
‘And as I finish tweeting Harefield United’s second goal they grab another’ while a fan at the Leighton Town v Oxhey Jets game tweeted ‘Unreal scenes Oxhey Jets down to ten and their player goes lovely day fancied a pint anyway’ after research I can unmask that player as Tom Inch (thanks to John Elliott for the information).

The result of this week’s Team of the Day Poll with 429 votes cast is:-
Tring Athletic 39.9%
Stotfold 25.2%
Harefield United 23.5%
Sarratt 11.4%

Don’t forget that every Sunday afternoon the Non-League Show on Three Counties Radio (Herts, Beds & Bucks), a show all about local non-league football. The popular show presented by Ollie Bayliss has been increased to two hours each week and is the perfect opportunity to catch up with our local non-league scene at all levels. For those who missed it then you can catch up here:-
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p0bsz4qs
Ollie Bayliss Non League Day

Further reading